Wednesday, December 14, 2005

What are you, FedEX?


Ladies, you know the drill: You're out at a party or bar, meet a really cute guy, exchange numbers, and then blissfully go to bed dreaming of picnics and phone calls the next day. Enter the next day... and nothing. Distraught, you painfully wander the halls of your house, asking your roommates why he didn't call.

By day two, you are still hopeful, but that hopeful is tinged with a touch of anger.

By day three, you have SO lost interest, and when an unrecognized number pops up on your cell, you don't even give it a second thought before silencing it and getting on with your day.

And around we go.

But never fear, because I now have the answer to this question that plagues the female species. I know why he didn't call! Sweet victory is ours at last!

After an insightful conversation with a man whom I have successfully lured into my clutches, (oh don't feel too bad for him, I think he actually likes being in my clutches) I have gotten him to reveal all the secrets of men, one of which is the little-talked about but often-employed Three Day Rule.

Essentially, after making initial contact with a female whom he would like to date, the man must wait three days before calling. Three days! What are you, FedEX?

I was told that you must wait three days because calling the next day makes you seem desperate, and calling the second day makes you seem desperate, but you tried to hide it, which is worse. But calling on the third day gives a man a devil-may-care, I-just-thought-I'd-drop-you-a-line feeling.

Actually, it means you suck.

Please call us whenever it is you feel like talking to us. You don't have to wait three days. We won't judge you. In fact, we might even go out with you.

If I am wrong about all of this, or if you have anything to say regarding this rule (loopholes perhaps?) feel free to comment!

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